How to Cope When Caring Feels Too Heavy
There are days in caring when everything feels manageable.
And then there are days when one moment — one accident, one conversation, one broken item, one form that gets rejected — tips everything over.
Caring is beautiful and meaningful, but it can also be overwhelming in ways that most people never see.
This blog is for those moments.
The moments when caring simply feels too heavy.
💛 When caring becomes “a lot” (and it happens to all of us)
Sometimes the overwhelm is big and dramatic.
Sometimes it’s tiny and ridiculous.
Both matter.
You might feel overwhelmed because:
✔ A partner has a serious accident or injury
Our founders know that story first-hand — involving a grandmother, an oven door, and an ear laceration.
No more needs to be said.
Life can turn upside down in seconds.
✔ A loved one is taking huge risks
Running off, refusing support, unsafe behaviours, or refusing medication — sometimes you can practically feel your nervous system buzzing.
✔ Support breaks down
A PA quits.
Funding is delayed.
A review goes wrong.
A carer’s allowance decision is reversed.
One change can add hours of extra work and emotional load.
✔ You lose something small — but meaningful
Maybe during a moment of distress, your loved one breaks the one “luxury” you owned.
Your iPad.
Your headphones.
Your air fryer.
Your TV remote you hid so you could actually choose what to watch for once.
The small things hurt deeply because they’re symbols of the tiny spaces where you still feel like you.
And yes, we all watch I’m a Celebrity here too.
💛 You are not weak — you’re overwhelmed
Caring carries:
emotional labour
physical labour
cognitive labour
administrative labour (benefits, funding, medication, appointments…)
social labour
crisis management
If you feel overwhelmed, it’s not because you’re failing.
It’s because you’re carrying more than most people could imagine.
So let’s talk about ways to lighten the load — even just a little.
💛 1. Share your feelings on Circles (yes — even anonymously)
One of the fastest ways to reduce emotional pressure is simply to say it out loud.
On Peopleoo, you can:
share your frustration
talk about what happened
describe how you’re feeling
vent without judgement
ask for advice
ask for solidarity
post anonymously using “post your voice, not your name”
You don’t have to hold it in.
There are carers, professionals, retired nurses, therapists and people with lived experience ready to say:
“Yes, I get it.”
“You’re not alone.”
“You’re doing your best in an impossible situation.”
And sometimes that’s enough to shift the whole emotional weight.
💛 2. Share your knowledge — it helps others and it helps you
When things feel heavy, you might think you have nothing left to give.
But sharing what you know:
helps someone else
builds your confidence
reminds you how competent you are
gives meaning to your experience
makes you feel less powerless
Helping others releases oxytocin — the same hormone linked to bonding, stress reduction and emotional regulation.
It’s literally biology.
Giving makes you feel better.
💛 3. Send a Special Mention — boosting your wellbeing too
Recognising someone else’s compassion or skill is surprisingly healing.
When you send a Special Mention on Peopleoo, you experience:
a burst of dopamine (reward hormone)
serotonin (mood stabiliser)
oxytocin (connection)
These are the exact hormones that help:
reduce anxiety
reduce overwhelm
increase resilience
lift low mood
calm your body
You’re helping someone else AND physiologically helping yourself.
A double win.
💛 4. Send an OOO — the gift of giving really is a thing
An OOO (Out of Office of Optimism) is quick, fun and powerful.
Send one to:
a friend
a neighbour
your mum who somehow cares for everyone (including you)
your colleague
your child’s nursery worker
the paramedic who treats your family like their own
Giving positivity genuinely boosts wellbeing — and it lifts the emotional fog for the person receiving it too.
💛 5. Let yourself feel what you feel
Carers spend so much time containing the emotions of others that they forget they’re allowed to have their own.
If you’re overwhelmed:
cry
walk away for a minute
shout in the car
sit in the garden
let yourself breathe
You’re human.
Not a machine.
💛 6. Ask for practical help — even if just for an hour
You deserve rest.
You deserve support.
You deserve a moment of quiet.
Ask a friend or family member to:
take over for an hour
cook a meal
clean one room
sit with your loved one while you shower
answer the door
bring a coffee
It’s not weakness.
It’s survival.
💛 7. Give yourself permission to pause
Not everything needs to be sorted today.
You can:
delay the form
ignore the laundry
leave the phone ringing
cancel the appointment
reschedule the meeting
order the takeaway
You cannot pour from an empty cup — and caring takes more from that cup than most people realise.
💛 Final thought:
Caring becomes too heavy when you’re carrying it alone.
You don’t have to.
Peopleoo exists because caring people deserve:
connection
reassurance
recognition
shared wisdom
space to breathe
a community that gets it
You are doing an extraordinary job under extraordinary pressure.
And even in the hardest moments, you are not alone.
We’re here — you, us, and the entire Circle of Care — to help you keep going. 💛
Join Peopleoo today — the community where carers talk, share, and change the language of care for good.